Universal Facebook Recipe

No thanks, Aunt Sally. I don't read recipes on Facebook anymore, because I have ALL OF THEM at my fingertips right here in my Universal Facebook Recipe meme! Please share this photo on Facebook or any social media site that has covered your nightmares in cream of mushroom soup or packets of ranch dressing dust.

Chicken chili crockpot photo is by flickr user Lesley Show, Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license.

In case it's too small to read, here's what it says:

Universal Facebook Recipe. Pick one meat from Column A and three seasonings from Column B. Add all Required Ingredients from Column C. Stir in crockpot* & cook on Low for 9 hours or High for 4 hours.

Column A: Meat
Ground beef, pre-cooked
Chicken
Pork chops
Li'l Smokies

Column B: Seasoning
Cream of Mushroom soup
Onion soup mix
Ranch dressing powder
Chili powder
Italian seasoning
Balsamic vinegar
Jar of salsa
Coarse Kosher salt
Himalayan sea salt
Star Trek security crewman turned into a cuboctrahedronal block of salt by an alien.

Column C: Required Ingredients (add all)
1/2 cup onions, diced
2 teaspoons garlic, minced
Bag of spinach
Bag of frozen hash browns
All of the cheese
Three more tablespoons of salt

* Federal law prohibits mentioning what SIZE crockpot you should use for any recipe, because people who can't afford large crockpots deserve to overflow. If they want to make crockpot recipes like normal humans, they should just get better jobs, harvested from a Better Job tree in the Land of Better Jobs.